Mister Manners answers your questions about when--and whether--to post photos online.

1. Can you offer some common-sense advice for online photo etiquette?
Before you post a photo of a friend online, ask yourself: Would I be upset if someone uploaded and tagged a similar photo of me? Is the image unflattering (whether physically or situationally)? Could this shot cause hurt or embarrassment? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, your course of action is simple: do not post.

2. Some examples of inappropriate posting are obvious. What are some more nuanced examples?
There are some people out there--and they know who they are--who seem to have oodles of time on their hands for scanning and uploading photos from an era that pre-dates digital. The inevitable album titles: "Our Crazy Frat Days" and "What Were We Thinking?" say it all. Indiscriminately uploading vintage shots is a sure-fire way of mortifying your old chums--a crowd that has likely long since graduated from meat markets to commodities markets. Unless you have express permission from everyone in the photo, do the gang a favor and snail mail them a print of the image you've scanned, and keep it off the web.

3. What are the dangers of inappropriate photo posting?
Anytime you upload and tag images of yourself or others, you invite the world to witness and share in moments that may have been intended to be private. No matter how stringent your privacy settings, you should presume that just about anything you put up on Facebook has the chance of being seen by unwanted eyes. Underage students have lost scholarships over photos of them drinking. Jobs have been lost (or never landed at all) thanks to scrupulous social media searches conducted by human resources departments. Relationships have been wrecked by incriminating images that pop up online. Friendships have been crushed when someone stumbles on pictures of parties to which they were not invited.

4. What does proper photo "etiquette" mean to you?
For starters, don't appoint yourself a paparazzo. Deliberately catching your friends on camera in the midst of doing something embarrassing is rude and uncalled for. Second, if someone asks to see a photo right after you've taken it, agree to do so without hesitation--no matter how vain you think the request is. And if they ask you to delete the shot, honor the entreaty and offer to take a new one. If it's an image you think you are likely to post online, ask them right then and there if it would be okay to upload it and tag it. And of course, if they really like it, offer to e-mail them a copy, too.

5. Do you have examples of photo posting that cross the line, either real or apocryphal?
A photo is worth a thousand words, but it also tells only part of the story. Something that looks wild and crazy might merely have been a fun pose. On the other hand, an out-of-control looking freeze frame might have been just the tip of the iceberg. I recently met a woman who was going to a bachelorette party where all of the ladies attending agreed that the only photos permitted from the night would be taken at the beginning of the evening, when everyone was still presentable and sober. Once the glam shots were out of the way, the cameras were to be put away, too.

6. Advice to parents to pass on to their kids?
Tweens and teens live their lives online, holding back very little. It's important for parents to stress to their kids that once a photo is on the Internet, it is nearly impossible to pull it back. This may not seem like a big deal now, but when the time comes for college applications, scholarships and job searches, those goofy or incriminating photos can and will come back to haunt.

7. What are the most common mistakes people make/may make while posting photos?
Shooting, posting and asking questions later. By the time the subject of the photo sees the image you've uploaded, damage to reputation may already be the result. I also think that people who are overly clicky (as opposed to cliquey) miss out on some of the real fun, because they're spending so much time viewing the action through a viewfinder or phone LCD that they never get to enjoy the party with their own eyes and ears.

As a longtime New Yorker myself, I take issue with the categorization of my home city as an epicenter of rudeness. I told the magazine as much and continue to defend Gotham any chance I get. Do we cross the street well before the crosswalk signals say it's safe to do so? Guilty as charged. Do we harrumph at Starbucks when we have to wait longer than a minute for a macchiato? Certainly. But there is no city I'd rather be when it comes to pulling together and helping out those in need...whether it's a tourist in need of directions to Strawberry Field, a fellow city-dweller who has dropped a scarf on the sidewalk or, more dramatically, pulling together in the immediate aftermath of a tragedy or crisis, as witnessed during the attack on the World Trade Center and the great Northeast blackout of 2003.

New York's reputation apparently suffers from years of negative publicity. The antiquated image of NYC as the Rotten Apple was given dramatic airing in films such as Fort Apache: The Bronx and the original Out of Towners. But those films portray a city that could not be more different from its contemporary counterpart. Crime rates are at historically low levels. Squeegee guys no longer besiege cars exiting the Lincoln Tunnel. Even our protests, as evinced most recently by the Occupy Wall Street demonstrators in Zuccotti Park, are uncannily peaceful.

Indeed, it's nothing short of miraculous that a city of 8 million people (one which swells daily with phalanxes of commuters pouring in through our bus, train and ferry terminals) is able to function with such (relative) absence of snapped tempers. Where else but in New York do straphangers ride literally cheek by jowl in sardine-crowded subway cars and merely grin and bear it? (Okay, maybe we don't grin, but most of us do bear it.)

But clearly we've got a public relations problem. What can we do to ensure that we don't land on T+L's list next year? Perhaps there are a few things we can do, starting with these five phrases...words that can help ensure we continue to peaceably coexist in the nation's most populous city:

"Excuse me?" is so much more preferable than "What?!" or "Huh?!"
"Sorry" ensures that an innocent nudge doesn't turn into an escalated incident.
"Please" is the antidote to "Gimme."
"Thank you" is the easy way to extend gratitude to ones who lend us a hand.
"You're welcome" encourages the proliferation of "Thank you."

Are we ready to show the world that we're not nearly as rude as they believe? I hope so. And for this advice, I say "You're welcome."

What do you think? Are you a New Yorker who believes we get a bad rap? A visitor who's had a less-than-positive experience in the city? Please share your comments here.

Denizens of good manners scored yet another loss late last month as New York's Metropolitan Transit Authority (MTA) introduced cell-phone connectivity on select platforms in the city's subway system. Riders "lucky" enough to have either AT&T or T-Mobile can now surf the web (and chat) at stations along 14th and 23rd Streets. Although this may seem like progress, I think there are simply places where cell service should not be an option....public rest rooms, funeral homes, houses of worship, movie theaters, airplanes and yes, subterranean subway platforms.

As if the wait for a train is not torture enough. Now everyone nearby can be held captive to the jibberjabbering of loudmouths whose voices reverberate through tunnels even more clearly than most subway annoucements do. And I'm not sure who gets the worse end of this deal...the other waiting passengers or the person on the other end of the line. To wit:

"HOLD ON, CHARLIE! THAT"S THE EXPRESS GOING BY. I'LL BE BACK ON WITH YOU IN A MINUTE. OOOPS. NOW THAT'S THE DOWNTOWN LOCAL. AND HERE COMES THE DOWNTOWN EXPRESS. HOLD ON JUST ONE MORE SEC." By the time the caller gets back on the line, you know this will be his inevitable next comment: "OH. HERE COMES MY TRAIN NOW. GOTTA GO! GREAT TALKING WITH YOU!!"

The one consolation here is that at least the phone will not work aboard a moving subway car. (Yet!) Until that "advance" comes to fruition, let's all follow these guidelines when using our phones underground:

DO:
•Surf to your heart's content. Browsing distracts no one but you. (As long as you're not playing Angry Birds with the volume up.)

•Send e-mails and texts--I've got nothing against multitasking--but keep the cute alert tones off.

•Keep your phone calls short and to the point. Unless you're a celebrity (and then, why are you riding the subway anyway?) no one wants to hear your conversation.

DON'T:
•Use the speakerphone when placing calls. It's bad enough that people on the platform have to listen to you. They certainly don't want to hear both parties.

•Keep talking if you've got a bad connection. Yelling "WHAT?!!!! CAN'T HEAR YA!" will endear you to no one.

•Get so caught up in a conversation that you actually miss your train. If you've got an important call to make, wait till you're above ground--and better, yet, more than 10 feet away from the next nearest person.

Is the MTA attemtping to make its incessant delays and crowded platforms and subway cars more palatable by letting us use our phones? I'm not entirely sure, but I will say that the greatest irony in all of this is that my cell phone now works better in the subway than it does in my apartment.

They call that progress?

What do you think? Tweet me @mistermanners.

What Manners Most recently caught up with Lisa Lori, president of Greenwich-based Lisa Lori Communications to discuss the traits that make an intern memorable--as well as the behaviors that make him or her the sort of staff member an employer would rather forget!

What made you decide to speak out on this topic?

We’ve had many interns over the years and after watching all of the talent that has passed through our offices, I thought it would be good to dispense some easy advice on how to get the most out of your job.

What are the first pieces of advice you'd give to anyone looking to be a successful intern?

Check out the show on Sirius 112/XM 157 this afternoon from 2 p.m. to 4 p.m. EDT!

I'll be hosting "Living Today" on the Martha Stewart Radio Network on Monday, April 25 and Tuesday, April 26. Monday's show will feature interviews with professional organizer John Trosko; Robert Kushner, author of Unleashed: A Dog and Owner's Guide to Losing Weight and Gaining Health Together; Jason and Kelli Krafsky, the so-called "Social Media Couple," on Facebook and families; Ellen Sabin, author of The Giving Book: Open the Door to a Lifetime of Giving; and Scarpetta restaurant chef Scott Conant.

What a show it's going to be! If you've got satellite radio, I'd love for you to tune in. The frequency is Sirius 112/XM 157, and I'll be on live from 1 p.m. to 4 p.m. on Monday, 2 p.m. to 4 p.m. on Tuesday.

I'll see you on the radio, and watch for an update on Tuesday's show soon!

Fear not, etiquette experts Thomas Farley and Diane Gottsman are here to help out with the burning questions everyone is asking. In the great tradition of British humorists, with a dose of Burke’s Peerage thrown in, forthwith are their responses to your FAQs: